The Yelling Never Stops...

Back and forth, back and forth…  they shout as if their volume will get them heard…  but whether I like it or not, the squeaky wheel get the grease and it’s true, the louder the voices shout the more they are listened to…

If you are like me you have voices in your head too.  They may not be the medical type but they are there none the less. 

One voice is faith the other is doubt. 

The first we celebrate the second we criticize. 

I’ve asked myself, am I so “good” at this faith thing that I can be in the place of criticism when someone isn’t as “tough”, “mature” or whatever?

Please forgive me but I think a story that is relative to this thought may help you and I to clear up the questions…

You may have heard some version of the old story of the indian who said that “it’s like I have two dogs inside me, one white and good, the other black and evil.  They fight all the time.”  The little boy listening to him asked “which one wins?”  To which the older one responds “the one I feed.” 

There, now you have the whole faith thing wrapped up… or not…

If you are like me, the black dog and/or the white dog comes to stay for a while and so after time, you have to make a decision.  Now before you read any further, I am not saying doubt is just “ok”, so read on and humor me a little. 

There are places in my journey when the “white dog” seems to be on vacation, maybe even sabbatical.  I call them dark days.  My faith, though clearly placed in Christ, does not just stroll back or come running when I scream for help while the “black dog” is nipping at my toes, or in my weakest worn out situation, maybe even my nose.

What do you do when the two dogs never seem to be at the “house” of your life at the same time?  I can’t say I’ve got this all figured out, but I hope that by sharing you might find some “faith”.

We hear this verse preached, quoted and even force fed as a case for faith, “without faith it is impossible to please God”. (Hebrews 11:6)  Please, my faithful friends from days gone by, don’t tune me out yet.  If you’re new to the faith maybe you will experience what I have as your journey leads through bumpy zones of belief.

So, venture back with me a few verses and then catapult with me to the writings that follow this famous verse used to shame those of us who dare ask, “why” or “where”. 

First, let’s really say it as it is, there are no “chapters” in this original writing we call “the book” of Hebrews.  It is a letter, written to address the faith issues of the early believers.  People like you and me who find themselves wondering and if not careful, wandering.

Next, join me as we look at the “who” this portion of the letter is talking about.  We call them the “heroes of the faith” and boy are they HEROES, or something.

 Abel – Check, did what God wanted.

Enoch – Check, got to go home early, no death.

Noah – first speed bump, he had some “doubt” and “disobedience” days.  One drunk night for sure.

Abraham – me a dad, no way, Sarah, are you kidding, and oh yea, she’s my sister (that may have saved my hide)

Issac – now we’re moving into the right direction, aren’t we?

Jacob – the deceiver and the thief, that later wrestled with God.

Joseph – sold by his brothers because he was daddies favorite and couldn’t keep his mouth shut, spent time in prison and time in the palace.

Moses – murderer, stutterer, angry at the whining mob, smacking a rock that wasn’t to be trusted, kept out of the Promised Land because of disobedience.

Gideon – wasn’t sure that God was telling the truth so he feared.

Sampson – “give me that donkey jaw”, “give me a haircut”, womanizing Sampson?

Jephthah – harlot mom and then there is that daughter controversy.

David – King? YES! Adulterer? YES! Murderer? YES! After God’s heart? YES!

Something’s up here….

You see, I don’t talk about these flaws because I think myself incapable of these, I actually take heart in the fact that such flawed and doubting people were listed in the “hall of faith”.  And I say it’s a shame we push them to superhero status and only focus on the end result.  You see if you read beyond them you see others who were not as victorious, they died because of their faith.  The writer says they are as good as or even better than those listed by name.

So, I say, please, if you doubt, doubt.  But like falling down, get back up and take a look around. You never know what little trip of faith-doubt-faith may be your catapult into the world of those who face a future of pain with a wavering yet grounded faith.

If you need to see how doubt lifted the faith of some other men, take a moment and look here.

~John the Baptist, “are you the one?”

~St. Peter, the early church namesake – “don’t know him!”

~Thomas, “I’m from the show me faith club.”

Well, there we are, a bunch of words on a computer screen.  Most have been said before, some I even borrowed from someone else, yet, they still need to be repeated...  I still needed the reminder, God knows to handle my doubt, your doubt, and how to keep us in His hands…

If you need to voices to stop, you may need to change your perspective.  Jesus said, "the student isn't greater than his master", so if Satan never left him alone while he was here then we should probably change our paradigm to match our masters.  Jesus' own words were "in this world you WILL HAVE trouble, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."

Here’s praying that when the black dog of doubt comes barking, try to fight off the fear, but for sure, don’t tackle him alone!

God’s grace to you today!

Thanks for taking time to share in the rambling…